Why is anything made by man considered "unnatural?" Why is anything considered "unnatural?" Just because humans make things that wouldn't be there without our existance, it doesn't mean that those things shouldn't be there.We're just making things as naturally as ants make hills or bees make hives. Why is honey "natural?" Bees made it out of pollen and whatever else is in their bodies. If bees didn't exist, honey wouldn't either.

The only "natural" things in the world are dirt and grass and trees and water. Dirt and grass and trees would not exist if there was never tiny bacteria before them to make them. And as for water, that's made from hydrogen and oxygen molecules. If one (or both) of those molecules didn't exist, neither would water.

I consider that something "natural" is something that can exist without the existance of another. Like the sun and stars, maybe. But the Earth itself? Not exactly. Without the sun, the earth could exist, but the life on it wouldn't. So maybe all life is "unnatural."

What do you think?

I noticed this while I was reading all of my old entries. And it's weird to see how concerned with religion I was back then, all because of Megan. And now I'm totally detatched from it, shivering with disgust when ever I hear lame Christian terms like "holy" and "grace" and "puh-raise tha lawd!" It's much too easy to manipulate my views. If I care for you, anyway. It was unintentional, I know, but being with Karly has made me turn against Christianity because of the crazy church that is stalking her. When she was in that church, it swallowed her life whole. I remember one time at lunch she was complaining about how Kristina wouldn't let her paint her nails black. In an annoyed kind of way, I would understand it if Kristina would stop at the color of her nails, but that wasn't the case. She controlled who Karly would talk to, what Karly thought of people, Karly's opinions, and even her sexuality. And now that she's out of the church, Kristina is still to blame for all of those aspects of her listed above because of her fear of being sucked back into the church.

I never become interested or uninterested in religion because of myself and finding who I am as a person. I either do it out of fear or I do it to spite. Like when I "became Christian" when I wanted to prove Megan's parents wrong and become a "good influence" on her. It's funny how religion teaches us that we should not be selfish, yet when ever I go searching for a Higher Power because I want to benefit someone else with it, it's wrong.

So what am I? I refuse to label myself as an athiest, the sound of that title is whiny and angsty in my head. I suppose I'd be agnostic, because I do believe in a God, I just don't know what to do about it. I wish the answer was closer to me. Or even better, I wish that it didn't matter so much. Maybe it doesn't. But I'm too worn out to wonder.